The Author

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I am a high school English teacher, and mother of two charming little ones of my own. I teach in a high poverty urban charter school, while I live in a typical American suburb that has frequently been rated one of the safest cities in the country. It is a paradox I struggle with constantly, but it is my life.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Sleep Deprivation and Figurative Language

I have lesson plan writer's block. I need to be writing a lesson right now, but I can't get through it. I keep getting stuck and distracted. So, I decided to blog instead. (Effective decision making, right?)
I am having one of those periods in my life where I feel like life is running away without me. It feels very much like running on a treadmill on a setting that feels just a little too fast to barely keep up. I desperately want to reach for the control panel and hit the "jog" button and turn the speed down, only it is not a treadmill, and I can't hit stop.
My son is sick with some weird infection in his eye, and he feels miserable. I came home from work early yesterday to care for him. By the end of his cranky, cranky day, I wanted to run away. So I did, after Tiana finally went to bed. Just to the gym, but, as tired as I was, it felt really freaking good. I think I exercised off the anxiety of the week. It was the PERFECT end to a rough day. They were showing Chicago in the movie theater and it was just starting, so I got to watch pretty much the whole thing, which meant I worked out pretty much non-stop for a little over and hour and a half. It is odd how much energy working out gives you. I felt wonderful today.

But now I am really tired, bordering on the edge of sleep deprived, which is honestly probably why I can't focus on lesson planning right now. I'm gonna try to go to bed soon here.

I just feel so bleh guilty that my son is sick, and I have to work and can't be here for him. I had to work from 7am-6pm today, and I have to do it again tomorrow. It is parent conference time, and I really need to be here for these. This is usually a rough couple of days, because it is so "go, go, go," but it feels awful to pretty much look at my husband when he says, "Vinny can't go to school tomorrow," and just throw my hands up. I do my best to help make arrangements, but I feel like my hands are just tied. I hate dumping my sick kid on other people. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about it.

We've reach an interesting point with Tiana and bed. She goes to bed every night in her own crib, and really likes it! In fact, it is now like she can't really relax and settle until I lay her down and she gets all comfy. Yet, I somehow wake up with her in my arms in the wee hours of the morning. I am not completely sure how she gets there. I might be getting up to get her, or Marc is and then putting her in my arms. I think, in my right mind, I would comfort her and put her back, but I am always a ridiculously hard sleeper, and I don't trace my nights well. I have been known to sleep walk and talk in my younger days, and the recollection of nighttime actions is exacerbated by sleep deprivation. I think maybe Spring Break will be the ultimate time to fix this.

You know what's funny... you know what my lesson is on right now- figurative language. Do I usually write with this much figurative language and I am just noticing it in the light of this lesson.... or am I subconsciously integrating my lesson topic into my blog?

1 comment:

  1. sometimes I wake up with Bella next to me and dont really remember exactly what happened.
    One time you slept walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge, then sat down on a chair and fell asleep again. Dad was mad that the fridge was open all night. Then another time you slept walked into the bathroom and started taking a bath, but the hot water woke you up. LOL

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